|Just about to start our "discussion"|
Me: "It's a manhole cover, dumbass, same one that was here yesterday."
Tril: "But it might eat me today!"
Me: "WHATever. Move on."
Me: "Dude, walk a straight line, would you?"
Tril: "But...what's THAT? And THAT? And..."
Me: "Knock it off. I know you're not actually scared. Walk a straight line."
Tril: "WHATTHEFUCK!" *props and freezes in place*
Me: "F'real? Tril, move forward."
Tril: "NO! There's a THING!"
Me: "TRIL. I know you. You aren't afraid of anything. But you love to play with everything. Move forward. ...Still no? Alright, then." <use excess rein to smack him on the butt>
Tril: "OH! Oh. Oh, I see you actually mean it. Moving forward then."
Me: <rolling eyes>
Tril: "OHMYGODWHATTHEFUCK is THAT?" <spooks hard in place, spins on his haunches, tries to bolt home when a flock of birds take off--REALLY? BIRDS?>
Me: "Oh NO YOU DON'T." <shorten one rein, spin him back the other way, kick him forward> "Enough of this crap."
Tril: *sigh* "Well...now I'm bored with this game because you won't let me play. I'll walk along at a leisurely pace, in a straight line, and on a relaxed rein now."
Seriously, he was perfect the rest of the ride. The manhole covers, weird looking tree stumps, birds, Mysterious Things et al didn't even cause him to do more than flick an ear again. Somewhere, his antics have worked for him--but not with me.